Spewing hellfire and brimstone from the pulpit takes an environmental turn. In a word, Bible-fondlers: duck!

From The Times Online: “The Bishop of London has declared it sinful for people to contribute to climate change by flying on holiday, driving a ‘gas-guzzling’ car or failing to use energy-saving measures in the home.”

Richard Chartres will encourage vicars to preach more green sermons and warn congregations that it is now a moral obligation for Christians to lead eco-friendly lifestyles.

Chartres, who chairs the bishops’ panel on the environment, said: “There is now an overriding imperative to walk more lightly upon the earth and we need to make our lifestyle decisions in that light.

“Making selfish choices such as flying on holiday or buying a large car are a symptom of sin. Sin is not just a restricted list of moral mistakes. It is living a life turned in on itself where people ignore the consequences of their actions.”

For example, unless you live in Italy, those custom-made Italian tiles = ETERNAL DAMNATION IN THE TENTH CIRCLE OF HELL, capisce?

Semi-related: Have you been turned on to Blogging the Bible by David Plotz, yet? It’s fantastic. As an elementary schoolgirl in the Cloistered Nunnery Academy for the Budding Bi-Curious, I once had the noble idea of reading the entire King James Bible (in the school chapel during recess, no less) but never got beyond Genesis because I was thrown off by the two conflicting stories of the Creation of Man. My verdict, even at that tender, impressionable age: The Bible is SHODDILY EDITED. It’s also now apparent that the Council of Nicea could have done with a copy editor or two. (If you’re trying to sell me something, at least get your story straight.)