Sometimes You’re the Cutter, Sometimes the Cuttee
Illustration by The Decoder Ring
This poster perfectly illustrates how the world makes me feel on a daily basis. I have a raging headache now from the circus act that spontaneously erupted in my brownstone apartment’s front yard—two young women completely flipping out over the sight of a dead squirrel. One of them was clutching a couple of plastic bags and tittering nervously, her legs frozen solid to the ground.
After five, maybe 10 minutes of listening to them squawk and flap around in obvious circles, I finally stormed downstairs to tell them to frikkin’ cut it out and CALL ANIMAL CONTROL. Sweet Holy Mother of God, what do they teach kids in schools, these days? I’m going to have to start whipping out Chekhov’s spray bottle out in public, so I can squirt water in people’s faces with a firm “No, no NO. BAD HUMAN.”
meranie said,
September 8, 2007 at 7:39 pm
In all honesty, we *aren’t* taught how to deal with dead animals. At least, not in NC. If there was roadkill on the road (most likely a squirrel), whomever’s house it was in front of went out with a shovel and scraped it off the road and I’m assuming put it in with the rest of their garbage, or maybe with yard waste.
I was more the type to cry over the dead squirrel.
By the way, should I ask Chekov how I could get into an enviro-job, or should I ask you? =) I am thinking about re-locating to the US, but only if I can get a job that I believe in and that will harness creativity and saving-the-planet. Suggestions? Could I send you an e-mail? I really don’t know anyone more knowledgeable about this, so…
Jenna said,
September 8, 2007 at 10:16 pm
“Sweet Holy Mother of God, what do they teach kids in schools, these days? I’m going to have to start whipping out Chekhov’s spray bottle out in public, so I can squirt water in people’s faces with a firm “No, no NO. BAD HUMAN.”
Only if I can carry one too. Please? I promise to only use it for the good of the gene pool. Honest.
shahong said,
September 9, 2007 at 5:56 am
jasmeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeen!!!! *waves*
ikisti said,
September 10, 2007 at 10:37 pm
yes, you can and must start carrying the “bad human” water around with you. People will be upset at first, but most of us will love you for it and cheer you on as our hero.
grannyannie said,
October 3, 2007 at 2:20 pm
A little common sense would be in order, don’t you think? We “protect” our children from real life. Death is practically hidden away. We are so out of touch with reality. When we were kids we probably would have had an eleborate funeral, or at least taken the dead squirrel to the back woods to disect it and see what made it work. :)