Die, Styrofoam Peanuts, Die!
Photo by 24thcentury, under a Creative Commons license
Whoever invented Styrofoam peanuts needs to die a laboriously slow, painful death. Even if I weren’t an environmentalist, Styrofoam peanuts would still be near—if not AT—the top of my shit list. They stick to everything: your hands, your clothing, your rugs—even your cats, who of course make things worse by cannonballing into the white abyss, spewing the putrid things everywhere. If that’s not enough, Styrofoam has the temerity to crumble into static-cling-loving confetti that you will be breathing in and cleaning off your floors and furniture FOR DAYS. I mean, you must really REALLY loathe someone to mail them a box full of Styrofoam peanuts.
I don’t care if you “recycled” them from another source, I’d rather have my exposed liver julienned by a flock of psychotic, inbred geese than try to shake off another fistful of Styrofoam peanuts, while I scream ineffectually down the darkened hallways of my own private Hell.
Victoria E said,
February 20, 2008 at 12:02 pm
Aren’t there enough pointless newspaper left in the world for folks to rip up and use that as making material?
Sabina said,
February 20, 2008 at 10:40 pm
This post is priceless!!
craftydabbler said,
February 21, 2008 at 3:24 am
I think I might be sensing a bit of anger… : )
Mandi said,
February 23, 2008 at 6:53 am
De-lurking to say I thought I was the only one who felt this way!
Secret Leaves said,
February 28, 2008 at 3:12 pm
I agree COMPLETELY. I hate them, hate them, hate them. We shred our vintage scraps–old sheet music, maps, kraft paper, etc., and use it as packing material. Not only is it environmentally friendly, it’s beautiful to look at!
Sharon
Leslie @ the oko box said,
March 1, 2008 at 4:30 pm
Those things should have been banned as soon as the invented the melty corn kind(and really should have never been approved), and I agree with Victoria E - there’s plenty shredded paper for the job !
michele said,
March 3, 2008 at 1:41 pm
This made me laugh, I just finished cleaning up after the one or two (pockets full) that my son left in his pants. They were all over the washer, the dryer, all the clothes for a couple of loads. They are evil little buggers with no positive qualities.
peace
Emilie said,
March 12, 2008 at 5:44 am
We moved a few weeks ago and the removals firm filled the boxes with thousands of those little maggoty things.. I wasn’t there to stop them. We are still finding them between clothes in the wardrobe, and under the sofa and yes, sometimes stuck to the cat, who tries to eat them. They must be very hazardous to pets if ingested. Thank god we don’t have a toddler crawling around.
These peanuts should be banned as there are some great alternatives, like mentioned above you can use scraps of things and recycle.. But perhaps that is not so commercially viable for big companies. When you shop at lush.com they pack their products in popped popcorn. I think that is a great alternative, it works, it’s natural, you can dig it into your compost after. And, it doesn’t stick to everything and is sort of safe to eat for your beloved creepy crawlies (though it might still be a choking hazard).
Hedgewitch said,
March 20, 2008 at 9:01 am
you have a fantastic turn of phrase!
glad I found your excellent blog :-)
Sherica said,
April 28, 2008 at 5:17 pm
Another 100% natural and cost effective alternative is a new type of peanut called Puffy Stuff ( http://puffystufftn.com ) made from the grain Milo. It’s static free and so safe you can eat it. The best way to rid of Styrofoam is to not buy it. Companies won’t purchase it if the consumer refuses to accept it. Hopefully in the future it will be banned nationwide as it is in many other countries. Until then, stick to the many alternatives there are out there :)