Archive for Dumbass Dumb-Dumbs

Die, Styrofoam Peanuts, Die!

February 19, 2008 at 11:26 pm · Filed under Dumbass Dumb-Dumbs, Environmentalism, Life

Why won't you just DIE???

Photo by 24thcentury, under a Creative Commons license

Whoever invented Styrofoam peanuts needs to die a laboriously slow, painful death. Even if I weren’t an environmentalist, Styrofoam peanuts would still be near—if not AT—the top of my shit list. They stick to everything: your hands, your clothing, your rugs—even your cats, who of course make things worse by cannonballing into the white abyss, spewing the putrid things everywhere. If that’s not enough, Styrofoam has the temerity to crumble into static-cling-loving confetti that you will be breathing in and cleaning off your floors and furniture FOR DAYS. I mean, you must really REALLY loathe someone to mail them a box full of Styrofoam peanuts.

I don’t care if you “recycled” them from another source, I’d rather have my exposed liver julienned by a flock of psychotic, inbred geese than try to shake off another fistful of Styrofoam peanuts, while I scream ineffectually down the darkened hallways of my own private Hell.

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Global Warning

August 17, 2007 at 2:20 pm · Filed under Dumbass Dumb-Dumbs, Environmentalism, Global Warming

Photo by Gilles Mingasson/Getty Images

Photo by Gilles Mingasson/Getty Images

Yes, NASA made an honest mistake, but that doesn’t change the overall global trend. (Read top climate scientist James Hansen’s response.) Why is there still debate over this? It’s not a matter of religion, politics, or personal ideology—in this case there actually IS a right or wrong answer, and the fact is the earth is heating up because of unrepentant, unrelenting human folly. In the end, it’s not about the environment, it’s about the survival of the human species.

The environment will repair itself—flourish, even—after we’re gone, because, as David Suzuki (I love this man) says in The 11th Hour, the planet “has all the time in the world.” But we don’t. We who needlessly, recklessly consume and endure the drudgery of work just to be able to overconsume again, at the expense of another’s suffering; we who have lost touch with the things that are truly important and of worth—we, our children, and their children will just be a blackened footnote in Earth’s history.

Earlier, I overhead two men fussing over the volumes of their iPhones. Thousands of years of civilization and it all boils down to whose ringtone is LOUDER.

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» Arkansas couple welcomes 17th child. Holy, merciful mother of God, stop it! You’d think that it’d hit them at some point that they’ve gone from reproducing to outright polluting. Someone barricade that woman’s vagina. [via Glioca] (7) #

» House OKs clean-energy legislation; Shrubya vows to veto. Schmuck. (0) #

» WW@TH: Filmmaker Takes Manhattan, 171 Starbucks Stores (0) #

» Treehugger.com WW@TH: Seed Sense: I See Vanished Vegetables (0) #

» Anya Hindmarch’s “I’m Not a Plastic Bag” madness hits Gotham. I’m also not a fad-chasing loonie with too much time on my hands. CRIPES, people. (2) #

» Treehugger.com WW@TH: Brazilian Fishermen Kill 83 Dolphins, Joke About It. Dickwads. (0) #

» Treehugger.com WW@TH: Science, Public Health Get Bushwhacked (0) #

» The right bashes Rachel Carson on the anniversary of her birth, because they suxx0r and eat their own boogers (0) #

» Treehugger.com WW@TH: USDA Waters Down Organic Standards (0) #

» Treehugger.com WW@TH: The Upside of Global Warming? (1) #

» Millions of cigarettes pulled from waterways. See also: Indoor Smoking Ban: Smoke’s on the Environment? (0) #

» DOUBLE WTF? The theft of a rare Amazon monkey from a Brazilian zoo could harm biologists’ efforts to repopulate the endangered species. Meanwhile, organized crime syndicates working with corrupt government officials have turned environmental crime into a multi-billion pound business that is rivaling the drugs trade. Nice one, human race. (0) #

» WTF? Republican lawmaker wants to block California and other states from regulating tail-pipe emissions (0) #

» Chief NASA climate scientist Jim Hansen calls NASA administrator Michael Griffin’s take on the non-urgency of global warming “remarkably uninformed” (0) #

» Treehugger.com WW@TH: Smithsonian Toned Down Global Warming Exhibit (0) #

» Why Bush hasn’t been impeached (0) #

» Treehugger.com WW@TH: Bob Geldof Slams Live Earth (0) #

» Pot is not like tobacco, kthanxbye! (0) #

» Fun with food Miracle-Gro sues TerraCycle. Boo, I say, BOO! (P.S. My windowsill herbs love their worm poop. We know what’s in your Miracle-Gro, Miracle-Gro!) (0) #

» Muslims discover virginity restoration surgery. I guess this depends on how you define virginity … I mean, can you unring a bell? Conveniently, there is no male equivalent. (0) #

» More than 70 percent of Americans don’t know plastic comes from oil (0) #

» Hunters kill one of last surviving Amur leopards (1) #

» Personally speaking Today, the guy in front of me at the checkout line walked out of the store with large bottle of Polar Springs water—his sole purchase—in a plastic bag. Jesus wept while I kicked the doofus in the ‘nads. j/k j/k j/k. Jesus was busy. (3) #

» Karl Rove is a big ol’ doodie head (Thanks, Rik!) (0) #

» Fun with food Monsanto wants to make rBGH illegal. Color me surprised. (1) #

» BOO, HISS, SNARL: Pesticide-maker puts profits over severe health risks (0) #

» Wired.com’s redesign is teh suxx0r (1) #

» Katrina’s legacy of pollution (0) #

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